Time is a funny thing

It was my fiftieth birthday.  I sat in my yard, under the shade of our great oak.

My journal opened on my lap, poised to write down the answer I most wanted to hear.

I had been asking the Lord if it was time for me to retire from the corporate job I’d held for over thirty years.  I loved my work, but the last couple of years had been challenging.  My heart longed to do something more meaningful with my time. So, I sat, as I had several times, waiting to hear “Yes! It’s time!”. But instead, I heard, “Be patient. You are right where you are meant to be.” I’m sure my sigh of disappointment could be heard throughout the heavenlies. I was fifty years old.  Didn’t God realize time was running out for me?

 Have you ever wanted something but thought life had passed you by?  Are you getting too old to do whatever it is you’ve dreamed of doing since you were young?  My fifties were plagued with these kinds of thoughts.  I had a vision for my life but God didn’t seem to have the same plan.  So, I waited, and got older and continued to do the only thing I knew to do.  I continued to live the life set before me.  My life verse began to have great meaning.

 “So, here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out.” (Romans 12:1-2 MSG)

 Then, at age fifty-nine, a door opened. I enrolled in a Spiritual Direction program. At age sixty-two I completed my training and have become a Spiritual Director.  Despite my age and despite a global pandemic.

 Hindsight is a beautiful thing.  I can now see that I wasn’t ready to step into my calling right after retirement.  I needed to walk with the Lord through the many mountains and valleys that shaped me in my fifties.  I now accept the Sovereignty of God over my life and understand that “His ways are higher than our ways and His thoughts higher than ours.” (Isaiah 55:9)

 To my amazement, at age sixty-two I am stepping into the new thing God is doing in my life. And I know beyond a doubt that His timing is perfect. God was the One who planted in me the desire to do something new long ago.  God was the One who equipped me and God is the One who determined the timing.

 Is time trying to tell you you’re disqualified because of your age?  Missed the boat? Maybe even too young? Don’t believe it.  Trust in the One who is the Creator of time and the Maker of dreams.  In the words of Saint Peter, “do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years and a thousand years are like a day.” (2 Peter 3:8)